Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
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