Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I guess "Ass Fun Friday" is not a thing no matter how many times I say it or bring it up in conversation...
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
