i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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