I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
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