Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
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