And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
