And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
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