someone get that fucking seahorse.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
