Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
theres a difference between trying to make someone happy and letting them fuck you in the ass
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
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