You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
Randomize
