Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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