I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Randomize
