I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
Randomize
