..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
