if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
