Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
