JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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