im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
there is glitter all over my balls
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
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