I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Apparently i tried to feed this guy's piranhas my whole left arm.. according to him, i was "showing them whos boss, bc if they try to eat my arm, im guna punch their face"
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