so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
well you can't waste a boner
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
Randomize
