she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Randomize