sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
A drunk and bleeding peter is knocking on your door... in nothing more than a sombrero, boxers and cowboy boots.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
