Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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