Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I'm watching porn in spanish. Thats studying right?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Randomize
