Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
You woke me up at 2 am to tell me I could pee in a golf club if I wanted to.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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