Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Who put my cat in the fridge?
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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