And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
