you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
