so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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