that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Woke up this morning to my mom on the phone with my dad saying, "It's probably just your prostate." Reasons to move out. Go.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
