The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize