He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I woke up with a dread of barbecue sauce in my hair. Drunk munchies makes me a disgusting person.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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