I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
Randomize
