I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
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