I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
