I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Threw my underwear in my purse as I was running away after sex last night, went to pick up my birth control prescription this morning, took out my wallet and accidentally flung my sweet thong onto the counter in front of the cashier. Think that was the universes way of telling me I am a whore.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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