So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
