Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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