His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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