Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Randomize
