Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I'm going to get like 25 drinks at their wedding and just leave them sitting around or give them to hobos.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
