I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize