Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
i'm the matthew mcconaghey of this party. i'm too old, and too high.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
