bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
