So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize