..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
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