It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
An ex-gang member just asked me out on a date via note. And spelled dinner wrong. Win?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
