is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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