I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
