covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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