problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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